In virtually every blog I write, I advocate for pausing: a chance to catch your breath, get some distance, and re-calibrate. A pause can be short – taking three breaths before inhaling that third piece of chocolate or long – waiting a few days before responding to an anger-inducing email. A pause can be as regular as a daily meditation practice or as intense as a 10-day retreat. Regardless of the length, pauses are always valuable. Those coveted minutes, hours or days give perspective and clarity and enable us to respond instead of react. In short, they provide space.
I’m currently in need of some serious space. 2019 was rough. There were some wonderful experiences but I also had a lot of headache and loss – Our nanny/housekeeper/”aunt” of 18 years unexpectedly passed away as did my Rabbi of 11 years. My oldest daughter left the nest and the most influential person in my life (aside from my husband and parents) fell from grace. I spent the majority of my time involved in a complicated, messy, unexpected situation because I happened to be on the Board of the organization. As a leader, I was cast smack in the middle of a scenario that cost considerable time, energy, stress and emotional expense. And the time it consumed was time I couldn’t devote to other aspects of my life. Thankfully, the situation and my board term are both winding down.
As the intensity of my role winds down I’m feeling just how disconnected I am from other aspects of my life. Though I was aware where my time was going, I wasn’t as aware of what was not being nourished. As soon as I had this epiphany, my instinct was to rush to action – schedule more groups, re-engage at places I used to frequent, organize a girl’s night, etc. But along with my instinct for explosive action, I concurrently realized that I don’t want to resume exactly what I had been doing. What I need is space; time to release aspects of this past year, re-examine my life anew and consciously embark on what’s next.
I spontaneously decided to host a “Releasing” ritual to help create space. In this context Space as two aspects: There’s the energetic/emotional space that is created when we rid of the old and there’s an intentional time space before embarking on what’s next. Please join me if you have a desire to “Release” aspects of 2019 and allow time before jumping into those (often doomed) New Year’s resolutions.
I wish you a festive and fulfilling Thanksgiving. Along with your turkey, I encourage you to carve out moments over the next month for space. Sit in your car and breathe for a minute before hitting the next mall, take a long bath before hosting, and mindfully sip that wine or eggnog. I promise you will enjoy everything even more.